What are Prosocial Skills?
A Child Development Term About the Ability to Get Along With Others
Jul 22, 2009
Prosocial skills help children make friends and maintain healthy relationships. The ability to behave in prosocial ways is also referred to as social intelligence.
The Definition of Prosocial Skills
In the book Social and Emotional Development [Redleaf Press, 2008], authors Riley, San Juan, Klinkner and Ramminger describe prosocial behavior as “voluntary behavior intended to benefit another person”. “Pro-social” is the opposite of anti-social. Anti-social actions result in others feeling distant while prosocial actions are relationship skills that invite others to feel positive and seek interaction.
When children interact in a way that is safe, pleasant and inviting to others, they are using prosocial skills and social intelligence or in layman’s terms, “people skills”. Children who are able to get along with others most likely have learned a variety of prosocial skills and have a high level of social intelligence.
Examples of Prosocial Skills
Sharing and taking turns usually come to mind when describing social interactions that help children make friends. Sharing and taking turns are good examples of prosocial skills as well as negotiation skills, the ability to delay gratification, problem solving skills and other skills involved in resolving conflicts.
More examples of prosocial skills and social intelligence skills are:
- self-calming skills
- being aware of one’s own emotions
- recognizing the feelings of others
- impulse control
- ability to make eye contact
Building a Foundation for Prosocial Skills
Sharing and taking turns is something that adults can observe by watching how children act. But child development professionals have also looked deeper to determine the foundation for prosocial behavior. In order for children to share, take turns, negotiate and express kindness, they must first develop empathy and perspective taking (being able to see another’s point of view). According to Riley, San Juan, Klinkner and Ramminger, “from the second year of life, children’s ability to understand the viewpoints of others improves.”
How Children Learn Prosocial Skills
Although the typical brain of a child develops more perspective taking ability after the second year of life, children won’t automatically acquire the ability to get along with others. Learning social interaction skills takes practice. The lack of hands-on practice is one of several reasons why it’s hard for two-year-olds to share toys.
If childcare providers and parents want to help children develop social skill such as sharing and taking turns, they must first help children develop empathy and perspective taking skills. When adults read books to children, they can ask children how the characters in the book feel. Playing with puppets is another way to help young children learn about different points of view. Children also learn from watching adults so parents and childcare providers can teach social skills through modeling perspective taking, empathy, self calming skills, etc.
Children need prosocial skills in order to form healthy friendships and other types of relationships. Learning to get along with others and developing social intelligence begins in the first three years of life. The social skills acquired in childhood lay a foundation for adult relationships with coworkers, managers, friends, spouses and children.
References:
Riley, San Juan, Klinkner, Ramminger. Social & Emotional Development: Connecting Science and Practice in Early Childhood Settings. Redleaf Press 2008.
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